Art heals. It’s 5:03 AM and I’ve been up since 2:49 AM. I have peripheral neuropathy in my feet and right now, the pain is horrible. I’ve taken gabapentin. I’m using a TENS unit and still the pain in my left foot is unbearable. And so I write this in the hope that writing will make the pain go away. The sky is covered with clouds so I can’t do any night shooting. It’s too dark to work with clay. I don’t have any bead ideas. Writing is all I have left to try.
After being on ½ of my regular dose of Wellbutrin for two weeks, I decided not to take any Wellbutrin and see how that made me feel. I was a bit growly, by no signs of withdrawal. I don’t have to be around people until Tuesday so there’s 4 days to see if I can function without Wellbutrin. I came off of it because I was getting hallucinations. Since retiring, there has been little stress. I’m off blood pressure meds. The back pain is only when I don’t do my back exercises for a week. Perhaps I only need a mood stabilizer now. I hope.
I’m taking a writing class and we all read each other’s stories. The story I read yesterday disturbed me. It’s written by a male student but the story is told by a female character. There’s a sexual assault. The story doesn’t treat the sexual assault – in this case unwanted touching – as an outrageous act but rather as a act that is almost expected. The female character doesn’t call the police although she does slap the male character. My first response was to tell the writer to stand up and I’ll grab his crotch so he can understand what unwanted touching is like. At the moment, I’m considering saying that while it’s possible I completely misunderstood the story (yeah, right), that kind of story in this kind of political climate is not acceptable. I’ll also explain that the unwanted touching described in the story is a felony in New Mexico and upon conviction, the male character would have to register as a sex offender. While I am vehemently opposed to censorship and banning books, one can’t write this shit right now. Or maybe ever. If nothing else, the sex offender in chief has caused women’s fury at unwanted touching to be taken to the street and demonstrated against. Why else would a reasonably intelligent woman wear an ugly pink had and call it a pussy hat? It’s not okay to touch me without my permission. I was a cooperating attorney for the New York Civil Liberties Union for five years. I’ve read a number of books for no reason other than someone wanted the books banned. I’ll defend this student’s right to write a story like this, but I won’t sit quietly and give the illusion that I’m not deeply offended.
It’s 15 hours later and I’m still in pain. I worked with clay this morning experimenting with a mug design. Then, because I didn’t feel like making another mug but I also didn’t feel like cleaning up, I started making hollow beads from clay. It’s an interesting experiment.
I’ve been working on jewelry. Here are some of the latest earrings. I’m thinking of taking them to the Farmers Market for a couple weeks and if they don’t sell there, put them in my online store.
These are some experiments. I haven’t decided if I like them enough to make a second one.
I see the neurologist on Thursday, and I almost pity the guy. I’m going to tell him – again – that I want this cured, reversed and gone. When he tells me – again – that can’t happen, I’m going to tell him that just because he doesn’t know how to cure neuropathy doesn’t mean it can’t be cured. There wasn’t supposed to be a vaccine against polio, but Jonas Salk refused to listen to that nonsense.
I’m linking with Nina Marie here. Stop by and see what other artists have been doing.
If you’re looking for a gift for yourself or another, please stop by my store here.